You can tell no worse lie than the lie you tell yourself!
Honesty is a virtue that causes more problems than many of us care to acknowledge. Not being honest with ourselves keeps us in miserable relationships, careers, and positions of influence. It causes us to stay at jobs that we hate. Self-deception can lead to all forms of addiction and maladaptive behaviors that contribute to premature death and disability, all for the sake of wanting to fit in or live up to societal expectations. And the sad truth is that it creates a ripple effect of mistrust, pain, and suffering. I know because I’m one of those people.
Learning to be honest with myself hasn’t been easy. Although my willingness to offer support to others has always been genuine, it has taken me years to understand that the compulsion to save others was often a convenient distraction from dealing with my own internal struggles. During my teen years I didn’t know who I was which made it impossible for me to be honest with myself, and pretty easy to fall into the trap of “people-pleasing.”
When I was in high school, I took pride in being recognized by my peers as “bad,” “hard,” “the Rolling Stone" (a name I acquired from my dad). I was so "bad" that in my senior year which was marked by turmoil, I began picking fights with people I didn't like. I became a “wannabe” bully and did an excellent job pretending to be content with the way my life was unfolding. Little did I know at the time that deep within, I was a gentle butterfly. The gifts of Gratitude helped me navigate the murky waters to self-discovery. It also introduced me to a few other life-changing virtues.
I’m grateful for the virtue of wisdom that whispered in my ear, "Be still and know who you are. Otherwise, you will forever be a miserable copycat.”
I’m grateful for the virtues of courage and humility. They continue to teach me that if I can't be authentic with myself, I am only fooling myself.
I’m grateful for the virtue of generosity and a quote by Maya Angelou: "When you get, give; when you learn, teach." Each day, I strive to live by these words.
Lying to yourself is like building a house on sand - it may seem solid at first, but eventually, the truth erodes the foundation, sometimes taking everyone close to you down with it. You can suppress the real you for so long that the truth becomes like a disease that rots you on the inside, unless you decide to let it out.
If you can't be honest with yourself, it's hard to be honest with others
If you don't know yourself, it's hard to know others
If you don't love yourself, it's hard to love others
If you don't take care of yourself, it's hard to care for others
Unwrap the gifts of Gratitude Journaling and
Unwrap the most unique gift you will ever know
The Gift of You!
Are you a copycat? Have you suppressed the real you for so long that you are rotting on the inside? Can you look in the mirror and say that what you think, say, and do are in perfect harmony?
Everything you need to be honest with yourself waits for you just on the other side of fear. Let Gratitude Journaling be the bridge that connects you to the other side. I’d love to help if you need it. Contact me at smallchange@myrtlerussell.com.
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